Something to ponder

Let me see, I can't think of how to phrase it correctly to relay my point. The topic is relationships of course. More specifically, one of my favorite past-times, flirting. I am referring to myself and how I view some of the things I do. There is a fine line between what I call aggressively flirting and sounding down right desperate. How does one keep from crossing that line? Do you know what I mean? I've been told some men like women who come on a little strong because it takes the pressure off of them to make a move. (Apparently men fear rejection as much as women.) On the other hand, I know some men who don't like it because they feel it is the man's role to be the aggressor. They believe it makes the woman appear desperate like she is throwing herself at them. Honestly I thought most guys liked that since it stroked their ego. How do you keep it in check? More importantly how is a relationship impaired person able to distinguish which route is appropriate?